Saturday, January 23, 2010

January 23, 2010

Hello, It has been awhile that I have been on here. (I forgot my log in and felt like I didn't have anything to say.) I have lost 70 lbs to date. I am up and down on the scale. I know I should not check everyday, but I do. My life as been nothing but a number. My pants are a number, I wore a pair of size 16. They were tight, but not tight enough that I could not breath. So to make myself fell better I say if it was a stretchy 16 then I could feel better about myself. I need to get my ass out there and exercise. I know that when I start to do that I will so feel much better and look better. I think I have lost 70 lbs and still I don't get the look I want. (Mental thing). People say look at you, you look good, blah blah blah. I can't find the inside of me that says HELL YEAH, KIM.

I can't talk about. I don't know why just can't. I think I have a inner struggle that I have been dealing with since I was 5 yrs old. I started getting round at that age. I got bigger and bigger. I wish I could take a pic of me and get rid of the 60-80 lbs left and say hey this is you skinny. I do not know what it is like to be small. I don't have the funds to get clothes that fit the frame I have now. I don't know who to listen to to get this lower blob belly to tighten up a little, blah blah blah.

I guess It will all work out. I hope the world doesn't end in 2012. I would like to have maybe 5 yrs of being less then 200lbs lol.

Good Night All,